"Food, Glorious Food"

Because of food habits like this, my ancestors fled to a new continent - and a new diet. For the complete NYT article on Scotland's horrible food fads, go here. But for purely selfish enjoyment, I am including the first few salubrious passages below:

As dinner sizzled and popped inside a vat of grease at Jaconelli's Fish and Chips, Deborah Ski, a customer eyeing the thick macaroni and cheese, did not mince words about Scotland's poor health.
Smoking is one reason for Scotland's "sick man of Europe" tag, she said. But another was staring her in the face: deep fried pizza, covered in a coating of batter for added crunch, sometimes doused with salt and vinegar or soupy gravy.

"It soaks up the grease like a sponge," Ms. Ski said. "It's heart attack material there."

The smorgasbord of Scottish indulgences goes on: fried fish, fried sausage and fried hamburger, also encased in batter. There was fried haggis (sheep stomach's bag) and fried black pudding (boiled pig's blood in intestines). If vegetables are required, French fries, or chips, are on offer, the saltier the better. For dessert, the fried Mars bar can be ready in no time, although not at Jaconelli's, where the concoction is ridiculed as a media-hyped fad.

"We're brought up on rubbish and, as parents, we give our children rubbish to eat," Ms. Ski said at the fish and chips shop, known as a chippie, in Mary Hill, a working-class enclave of Glasgow. Life today is a mad rush, she said, and few people have time for a proper sit-down dinner. "There just isn't anywhere to go to get something quick that isn't rubbish."